Plague: Renier City Map

Renier City Map

This past week I wrote the prologue for the second book in the Plague series. I would have started it sooner, but I had another story that stuck in my head and wouldn’t leave until I wrote it. Well, it’s now written, so onward with Plague.

For those of you who have read Plague and wondered about the size and scope of the city of Renier I’ve drawn a map. The continuing story will also have a map, and I’m working on that now. It’s a necessary reference for me when writing on this scale. The map for the second book will entail the whole kingdom and surrounding areas, more like what you would see in many fantasy novels. It’s still in it’s rough draft stage. I’ll be tweaking it while I write.

Anyway, for those of you who have read Plague and wondered about Renier, here it is. For those of you who haven’t read Plague and haven’t wondered about Renier – well, here it is for you too, though you probably don’t know what I’m talking about or care.

Plague, is now available as a paperback novel. Yep, paperback. Also with the paperback version you get some fantastic pen and ink artwork by Alex McVey, Tom Moran, Brandon Layng, and myself. So if you get a chance stop by Amazon and have a look.

THE ASAP DANCE

I per-ordered a Stephen King book from a publisher in May, a very nice copy of one of his more popular novels. It was a limited edition fancy copy. I’ve not had the best of dealings with this publisher before, but this was a book that I just couldn’t pass up.

Late December the publisher sent a generic email that they were shipping the books. I was excited. I waited…and  waited…and…no book arrived. That being the case I contacted the publisher on December 21 and asked why my copy hadn’t arrived. Five days later they got back with me. The publisher said they were having trouble with their website the day I placed my order. They had no record of my order, and I needed to email them proof that I had purchased the book.

I looked at my credit card records online and found the transaction, then sent the information to them later that same day.

On the 28th I got an apology from the publisher stating that the book would ship out ASAP.

This is where I start getting aggravated.

I figured that since it was their screw up and my copy of the book was already two weeks behind they might just friggin’ expedite it to me a bit faster. That is what ASAP means, right?

On the 4th of January (seven days AFTER the ASAP comment) I got a tracking number for a media mail package. Is it me that doesn’t understand what ASAP means? Is a week later considered ASAP? I don’t think so, but I could live with it since something was finally happening.

Well, it’s now the 10th of January and all the tracking says is that the shipper has been notified that they will be getting a package. Again, what does ASAP mean?

I do believe this will be the last friggin’ book I ever purchase from these people, and it’s a shame because they have some really nice books.

Writing Goal

Earlier this year I started a novel set in a fantasy/steampunk world. It had a touch of humor, adventure, magic, steampunk goodness, and even a smidgen of romance. The working title of my story is Clockwork Dwarf, and who knows, it might wind up being the finished title too. I’ve had a lot of alternates jump into my noggin, but the Clockwork Dwarf one has stuck.

Above is a page from my notebook. While writing this story I doodled images, jotted down notes, made a list of characters as they presented themselves in my story, and made this map. I put the Pepperbox revolver on it, and “sepiad” the image because I was experimenting with a possible cover. I doubt what you see above will be it. Anyway, getting back to my notebook. I’m extremely visual, and doodling scenes from my story sparks new ideas, and adds fuel for the old story engine.

The reason I’m bringing all this up is that it looks like I’m gonna have the first draft done by the new year, slightly ahead of schedule. I’m right at the 90K word count now, and it looks like there will be another 10K to finish the first draft. As I wrote, new ideas came to me, so I’ve got notes on top of notes that are going to really flesh this story out. It’s also going to raise the word count a bit, so I’m expecting this one to top the 100K count pretty easily. At the moment it’s about 2k longer than Plague, and I feel like Sam Gamgee when he told Frodo that if he takes one more step he will be further from the Shire than he’s ever been. Yeah, that’s how I feel.

My novel, Plague, is now available as a paperback novel. Yep, paperback. Also with the paperback version you get some fantastic pen and ink artwork by Alex McVey, Tom Moran, Brandon Layng, and myself. So if you get a chance stop by Amazon and have a look.

Superworms

For my birthday this past September I got a bearded dragon. He/she was a tiny thing, about as big around as my index finger and not much longer. Well, it’s three months later and the lizard is a real handful, and when I say handful I mean he fills up my entire palm with his head sticking out one side and his tail drooping over the other. That is fantastic, except that his appetite is huge. I’m having to go to the pet store every week or so and buy him 100 superworms.

I hate going to the pet store, though I suppose it’s not the pet store in itself that I hate, it’s the traffic in that part of town. That being the case I got online and looked up how to raise my own superworms. My first thought was from the movie Dumb and Dumber when they were going to start a worm store called “I got Worms”. With a quick look at a couple of websites I had a game plan. The whole process is easier than I thought so I got everything I needed and got started.

Image obtained from: http://www.pixiesexotichedgies.webs.com/

First you got to separate the superworms you want to breed into their own separate containers. Easy enough. Next you got to wait and after a week or so most of them will curl into a “C” shape. Another week or so and they metamorphosis into pupae.

That’s where I am now, a tackle box full of pupae. They are alien looking and if you open the top they stink like nobody’s business. Needless to say I ain’t opening the top till I have to. The one time I did it is regrettable.

Next they will become beetles, mate, lay eggs and then the process will start all over again.

At this point it is an experiment. If it works out I my continue with it and save myself a little money and lots of trips to the pet store.

The wife wasn’t too happy about the idea. Actually, she wasn’t too happy about the idea of having them in the house to feed the lizard, but the idea of raising worms really went to the next level.

Somebody’s got to do it and it might as well be me.

My novel, Plague, is now available as a paperback novel. Yep, paperback. Also with the paperback version you get some fantastic pen and ink artwork by Alex McVey, Tom Moran, Brandon Layng, and myself. So if you get a chance stop by Amazon and have a look.

Electrical Cemetery

Image copied from: http://www.untoldthegame.com/splintered-serenity/setting/north-america

Today I was putting around Beaumont with my youngest kids when I passed a cemetery that I’ve passed a dozen or so times before. It’s a small cemetery and I’ve never thought much about it, but what I noticed this time sent a chill down my spine. What was different this time you ask? Nothing. I’m just not worth a damn at noticing things, but this time I noticed something of the utmost importance. A power substation. Yes, a power substation. Why would that bother me? Why wouldn’t it? Have you ever read Frankenstein, or seen any of the movies. The combination of that power station and a cemetery right against its fence is a zombie factory just waiting to happen. One good discharge into the ground on a rainy night and it’s a done deal. Get ready folks ’cause ground zero could be right there.

Now on a more serious side…

My novel, Plague, is now available as a paperback novel. Yep, paperback. Also with the paperback version you get some fantastic pen and ink artwork by Alex McVey, Tom Moran, Brandon Layng, and myself. So if you get a chance stop by Create Space and have a look. It should also be available at Amazon any day now.

Contest

Join Purple Sword Publications and our September Blog Party! Meet new authors, visit some favorites, find some great new books to check out, and best of all, be eligible for some amazing prizes. Email Robyn at promorobyn@gmail.com for rules and more details.

Through the month of September Purple Sword Publications is running a Blog Event drawing. The contest rules are as follows:

All contestants must email the following information to promorobyn@gmail.com, subject line SEPT BLOG EVENT in order to qualify for one of the prizes: The authors names and the inspiration for each of their books.

My blog event entry will be for The Witch, the Hunter and the Bride.

The Witch, the Hunter and the Bride is a story that takes place in an earlier time. A time when men thought thunder and lightning were caused by angry gods. A simpler time when a man’s concerns consisted of food, family and a place to dwell. The story is about a man who is deeply in love with his wife, but is unwillingly drawn to infidelity through black magic. It is a story of love, guilt and dark magic.

When I first began writing I never thought that I would write an erotic tale. My stories are firmly anchored in horror and fantasy, but this changed when a fellow author asked me to write an erotic story for an upcoming anthology on gremlins. At first I balked. Me, a writer of erotica! What will my mom think? What will the guys at work say? I emailed her back and said I would think about it. I figured I would draw a blank, but the moment I pressed the send button an idea took root and began to form. It consisted of an ancient world deep in the forest, a witch looking for a spell component that she could only get from a man, and a hunter with a wife that he dearly loves, but is forced to betray.

My inspiration for the story came from my love of fantasy literature, a simpler life, and wondering what it would be like to be powerless in the face of a moral dilemma.

  The Witch, the Hunter and the Bride is available at Purple Sword Publications and for the Kindle and Nook!

Kindlegraph

Here’s a new Kindle feature that  was pointed out to me the other day. It’s digital autographs and personalizations by authors for Kindle readers. I don’t know if this trend will take off or not, but it is an interesting idea.

I added my Kindle books to the site this weekend. The process was painless, but I still managed to flub it up. No surprises there. I am currently listed as “BretJordan”. Yeah, “BretJordan” with no spaces. You say that isn’t so bad. Well, if there was a space I would be classified with the “J” authors like I should be. Without the space folks are gonna have a hell of a time finding me in their author database. Heck, I had trouble finding me in their author database! I hate finding myself.

For once this name thing wasn’t my fault. At least I don’t think it was. Well, maybe not. My Kindlegraph account was made from my Amazon account…or maybe my Twitter account…yeah, Twitter. I don’t use Twitter too much as I currently have more social networking accounts than I can keep track of. No problem though, other than my Twitter account is under the name of “BretJordan” – one word. Damn my luck!

Okay, you’re saying to yourself, “Quit complaining and just go back and fix it.” I wish it were that simple, but as of yet, I haven’t been able to find any reconfigure tools for my Kindlegraph account.

UPDATE: Just went and looked again and still couldn’t find anything. I don’t think I’m missing it either, as there just aren’t a lot of account settings.

Anyway, get over to Kindlegraph and check it out. If you’re not an author then I wouldn’t worry too much about the name thing, but if you are an author then double check your name while you are setting up an account – and if you see where I went wrong please feel free to enlighten me.

To help anyone who might be looking for me under the “J”s here is the books I have listed with Kindlegraph:

Bret Jordan Books at Kindlegraph

 Plague is available for Kindle and Nook!

The Witch, the Hunter and the Bride

The Witch, the Hunter and the Bride

Available in Kindle format.

Blurb:

When Monteh the hunter becomes trapped by Nagoi the witch’s lustful song, he finds he must battle the guilt that threatens to overcome him while hiding his unwanted adultery from the wife that loves and trusts him. When he does find the courage to sever his vile relationship with the witch, he finds the task isn’t as simple as he had hoped. A dark sorceress isn’t easily spurned.

Excerpt:

Monteh stepped into a leaf-covered bank next to a stream, leaning his bow against the white bark of a tree. He stretched his neck back and forth, working out some of the strain from his tired muscles. Nagoi hadn’t arrived yet. He wasn’t surprised, for she never showed up before he did.

He hated coming here, but he couldn’t help himself. The seductive witch had him under her spell, calling him to this place two, sometimes three times a week. At least now she showed some affection, no longer treating him with the cold embrace of a slave whore.

He had been hunting deer almost a year ago when she had captured him in her spell. He had his bow pointed at a huge buck, string pulled taut, when a mellow song struck his ears. The bow slowly pointed toward the ground, the string went slack, but his body had a different reaction. Beneath his buckskin breaches his member came awake, the sweet music enticing it, bringing it further to life with each seductive note.

The bow dropped from his hands, forgotten as he stumbled through the thick woods, searching for the source of the hypnotic sound. He didn’t walk far before seeing her. She sat on a stone that rose from the ground like the fin of some great earthen fish. Her hair fell down her back and over her shoulders, a glistening midnight waterfall. She wore a skintight black dress that hugged her curves and squeezed her ample breasts together. A mischievous smile teased the edge of her supple red lips. Monteh had to have her. Every fiber of his being wanted to grab her and hold her tight, to sink himself deep into her. His cock twitched and strained against its leather confines, a hunting dog with a fresh scent. It wanted release. He wanted to release it.

She didn’t speak as she slid off the lichen-covered stone, folding her legs beneath her, and summoned him with a wave of her hand.

Monteh didn’t remember walking toward her, but suddenly he stood over her, looking down into her almond-shaped eyes, the eyes of a cat and as black as the void. He knew he should be overcome with fear, running for his life to escape the evil creature, but desire overwhelmed him. He had to have her, the mysterious and seductive woman.

Drunk Driver?

On my way to work there is a short stretch of road that forms a long radius 90, a quarter of a mile long or so. It takes me from one highway and merges with another. This morning I noticed that the person in front of me drove about fifteen miles per hour below the speed limit; slightly aggravating, but nothing too bad. What struck me as odd is how the driver tried to take the turn in a streight line then would overcompensate by making a sharp turn, almost bouncing off the other shoulder before they would overcompensate again and go the other direction. I thought of several reasons why this could be happening:

A: Elderly

B: Cell Phone

C: Drunk

D: Applying Makeup

E: Reading a novel

Once the traffic merged I got in the opposite lane and drove past the driver. As I passed I had to look and see what sort of person I was dealing with – female, approximately thirty years old with both hands on the steering wheel. Well, that ruled out elderly, cell phone, applying makeup and reading a novel so I’m gonna have to go with drunk.

Drunk lady, I wish you the best and safest trip on your journey to wherever it is you might be going.

 The Haunted brothel is available for Kindle and Nook!

Amber and the Lizard

Little miss Amber is at it again. This time it’s her showing off her pet lizard. Sometimes she lets him sit on her head and sometimes he sits on her shoulder like a parrot. He’s a docile fellow and does just about anything she wants with a little help. There’s a good reason for this though. It’s because he’s dead. Yep. Dead.

“What happened to him?” you ask.

I don’t really know. Nor do I want to know as some things are just better left that way.

Shaylee Druid’s Staff Available for the Kindle!

Shaylee Druid’s Staff Available for the Nook!